Lately, I’ve been reflecting on what it means to shape of my character. Given my interest in Hellanistic texts, I’ve taken inspiration from Chrysippus, whose ideas have resonated with me since I read them.
The Shapes Within Us
Imagine two shapes, a cylinder and a cone, resting at the top of a hill.
A gust of wind comes over the hill, pushing both shapes into motion.
The cylinder rolls forward in a nice, smooth motion down the hill. The cone will briefly roll down before veering off to the side.
Both shapes have been exposed to the same gust of wind, yet have responded differently. This shouldn’t be a surprise. After all, a cylinder has no option but to roll forward. A cone will roll forward and then to the side. The wind merely sets things in motion. It is the shapes that determines what happens and how each object moves.
Now, let’s put these shapes inside of us and imagine them as part of our inner selves.
A cake appears before us and we are pushed into motion. If we are shaped like a cylinder, then we will roll on by, perhaps appreciating the design and taking a few tasty bites. If we have a cone shape the response will be different. We’ll eat the whole cake, unable to stop.
Our character is like these shapes. It determines how we will respond once we have been pushed into motion. We act according to the nature of our shape. Whether we roll smoothly or veer of course depends on the work we have done to develop our own shapes.
When our shape is poorly developed, we can respond to life’s events in unhelpful ways. Some examples include:
- chasing externals
- not having resilience
- being mean
- losing our temper
- sending a poorly worded email
- applying incorrect use of reason
- thinking we have been harmed when we haven’t
- not applying knowledge
- not fulfilling our roles and duties
- chasing after things that aren’t part of our goals or values
Conversely, if our shape is good, we can act with reason and wisdom. We will have patience and abstain from anger when we encounter someone who insults us. If we are still developing our shape, we can train our patience and refrain from anger, remaining gentle and kind in difficult situations.
Progress
We should focus on making progress.
“I view with pleasure and approval the way you keep on at your studies and sacrifice everything to your single-minded efforts to make yourself every day a better man.”
Seneca, Letter V
Just as a builder learns more about construction techniques and the importance or solid foundations, or a teacher improves upon their ability to teach, we must also learn how to shape ourselves correctly.
Our shapes are imperfect so mistakes will happen. We will learn by getting things wrong. Just as the most vigorous trees and branches need wind to build their strength, we also need to experience events we don’t enjoy to develop our own resilience. Each event that we encounter and learn from helps us to refine our shape.
We know we need to go to the gym regularly to get stronger. Developing our shape also requires this type of dedication. We need to train our minds to develop reason, gain knowledge, and improve our judgement. We should commit this time to improve, just like we commit time to complete our workouts.
Ideas
How can we develop our shape?
For me, it’s practices such as:
- Time with family
- Thinking before responding – I write and reflect in my journal at night to examine these events
- Working out
- Reviewing the week ahead to look at commitments and making sure they are aligned
- Morning coffee walks – time outside and with my wife and daughter
- Time with friends
- Serving others – being a part of a community
- Being of service in the house – meals, cleaning, finances
- Making progress towards my goals – staying focused on what matters
From this list, we can turn our ideas into actions, such as going to the gym tomorrow, organising a walk on the weekend, and so forth.
With a better shape, we can roll further and do more.
For me, it’s a constant work in progress. A journey I’m excited to be on. One where I can, in time, improve my shape and carry out more of my duties.
What are some things you are working on to develop your shape?